Time for poem

Smile you say
They say you are strong
However there a fire
One that is hot to touch.
But it draws you near.
Until you are sucked in,
Can't escape the burns,
The hate,
The words
Ugly
Stupid
Week
Worthless
Not needed.
You know they right,
You try and hide it,
But you keep going back,
To the flames,
And there is no escape.

There are times where there is a fire in my brain in which I try and blank out and the fire does draw me in to where I believe that I am ugly, stupid, week, worthless and not needed. Due to these thought I have self harmed, nearly today. It always the same method burning my wrist on the stove.

It not something I want to do once I do it, but when I do it not me doing it.  I do try and stop myself from doing it but sometimes I in so much pain that I can't think other wise.